Jessica: Making Sexy Expensive for Justin.

22 02 2012

I was quite disturbed to wake up this morning and find this story in my newsfeed about Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake. She wants him to sign a pre-nup that says he has to pay $500,000 if he cheats.

Ugh.

There are multiple issues I have with this entire story.

1) Why are they engaged to begin with? 

I thought Justin had transformed over the years to an actually pretty cool guy. I was not a fan of his during the N S Y N C days being a JC lover myself, but after realizing he’s hilarious (via SNL) and no longer talks like a pre-pubscent boy, (not to mention the fact that he was brave enough to “bring sexy back” from wherever it was hiding) I have become more of a fan.

And let me be clear, I have no clue what it’s like to be a celebrity or what either of them are really like. I do feel kind of weird being all judge-y about this anyway, though celebrity culture is a reflection of our society that helps us analyze and deconstruct the world around us, so though they are real people they are also symbols and representations that need to be discussed. That being said, I remember a story about her where she explained the reason she wasn’t getting better movie roles was because she was “too pretty.” Too pretty. Not that she couldn’t act or the parts weren’t right for her, but that the world was picking on her because she was way too beautiful and no one in Hollywood stand it.

Umm.

What?

Classic narcissist.

Seems like a really big red flag.

Though the pre-nup is an even bigger one.

2) Love + Money = Not Love. 

Yes. We unfortunately live in a capitalistic society where money is valued more than people. But 500,000 for cheating is incredibly insecure even for the most monogamous untrustworthy of relationships. Would it make a difference if the clause was for less money? Not to me, because the whole idea of a cheating clause is ridiculous and sad. And if I were to sign something like that and I had as much money as JT the first thing I’d do is go out and sleep with someone else just to try to get away with it.

3) Monogamy and Movie Stars. 

You know how all non-celebrities have a list of like five celebrities that they could sleep with and it not be considered “cheating?” What happens if you are a celebrity? Do celebrities get a list of like five non-celebrities that they could sleep with? Or can they also make the same list but it just happen to be more of a reality? Seems like any time you’re working in close proximity and potentially having sex scenes and such on camera there’s going to be chemistry that develops. Does it really hurt the other one when those sex scenes happen? They’re not there and it’s supposedly considered “acting,” but even if it wasn’t acting and it happened who does it hurt?

If I am, as an example, dating June (made up person) but spending my day with Jack ( another made up person) and I happen to touch Jack, to kiss Jack, how does that hurt June who is not there anyway? My question is, what is it about physical signs of affection that seem more powerful and hurtful than emotional or spiritual connections with others? What’s so wrong about getting rid of the list and experiencing people for who they are and what they have to offer to us in all the different capacities of relationship construction? I don’t own June, June doesn’t own me. Seems like Biel is trying to own Justin. And I don’t think Justin seems like the type of person who wants to be owned (though maybe occasionally in a deep dark dungeon somewhere with a mistress and a whip; yeah I just made that up cuz it sounded hot.)

4) What Goes Around. . .

And what about her?

How is such a beautiful woman going to be able to resist her temptations? Will she have to drop dollars if she transgresses? And if not, why?

5) Put a Ring on It?

Could we maybe just stop putting such an emphasis on marriage? I know I’m in a minority here but I just find the institution outdated and unnecessary for most couples generally. It works for some. But it doesn’t work for all. And maybe if less celebrities kept tying and untying the knot people could begin to realize alternatives that could work better for them. Maybe the 500Kgrrrl could end up becoming part of a triad with Jessica and JT? I wonder who 500Kgrrrl is going to be? We should probably start placing bets now. Because that much insecurity at the beginning of a relationship cannot possibly be healthy or help the relationship stay strong (or long).

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