People Still Sleep?

25 05 2012

Today will be the tenth day I’ve worked in a row. Last night I closed the store, this morning I will open it. I hope that my legs do not fall off. I can see them literally falling off.

I sold so many vibrators last night the whole city should be a buzzing today with a post-orgasmic glow.

Is there anyone left that doesn’t have one? At least one?

I read an article in the Atlantic about the founder of Jimmyjane that claimed 50% of people own a sex toy–that’s a higher percentage than people who use condoms. Technically another form of safe sex. . . which I’ve concluded would be a good thing to give like every boy and girl going through puberty–every 13-year-old girl gets a beginner vibrator and every 13-year-old boy gets a fleshlight. Though, if every boy had a fleshlight it wouldn’t have to be disguised as a flashlight since it would be a common household item. Seems like a way to keep them entertained and able to explore without the downfalls of disease and babies.

I’ve just realized that I should have slept longer instead of getting up to blog. I hope you’re all happy, because I’m going to drag ass today.

But yay! My parents will be here this weekend. Family time. I haven’t seen them since December. I don’t know how I’ve gotten so bad about getting home. Full-time job I guess. And before that, lack of job–meaning lack of finances to travel. So, that makes sense. Where does the time go?

Holy fuck I think I need to go take a nap. Would that be weird? I have an hour before I need to leave for work. Seems reasonable. Someone text me and make sure I get back out of bed.